DEAR JANE: My best friend invited me on vacation with her

Time:2024-04-26 03:16:58Source:International Issue news portal

Dear Jane,

One of my closest friends has invited me away on a girls' trip to Italy this summer - and while it sounds like a dream vacation, there's something holding me back from pulling the trigger on confirming. 

The only time this friend and I have travelled together before, she drove me totally insane with her incredibly odd flying habits.

She suffers from anxiety and has a fear of flying, so I understand entirely why she relies on these 'rituals', as she calls them, to get her through long plane journeys, but the idea of sitting there next to her while she's doing them for eight odd hours is just not something I think I can handle.

I know you're probably thinking, 'How bad could they be?' but trust me here.

Dear Jane, my best friend invited me to go on vacation with her - but I'm so embarrassed by her in-flight rituals that I can't stand the thought of flying with her

Dear Jane, my best friend invited me to go on vacation with her - but I'm so embarrassed by her in-flight rituals that I can't stand the thought of flying with her

Not only does she insist on spraying this disgusting-smelling 'soothing mist' every five seconds, she also meditates – loudly, with humming – whispers affirmations to herself, and routinely shakes her whole body to 'release the tension'.

These are the things she does to cope, I understand that completely. But it's slightly mortifying to be sitting alongside her while she does this whole routine, and frankly it ruins my experience when all I want to do is down a glass of red wine and go to sleep on long flights.

What I'm wondering is whether you think I can get away with somehow booking us on different flights without bringing this whole thing up. 

International best-selling author Jane Green offers sage advice on DailyMail.com readers' most burning issues in her Dear Jane agony aunt column

International best-selling author Jane Green offers sage advice on DailyMail.com readers' most burning issues in her Dear Jane agony aunt column

We live in the same city, so it would be tricky to get by her, but maybe if I make up a lie about having some extra air miles on a different airline?

Or does that make me the worst friend in the world?

From,

Flightmare Fear

Dear Flightmare Fear,

If all you want to do is down a glass of red wine and go to sleep on a long flight, I strongly suggest you drink that wine, get an eye mask, and a very good pair of ear plugs to listen to music, or a soporific story that will send you straight off to sleep.

Your friend's behavior can easily be drowned out. 

As for being mortifying, I would treat it with humor rather than embarrassment or discomfort. 

Nobody is going to judge you for your friend's muttering and shaking, and who knows, she may see the funny side of things if you start doing ridiculous 'anxiety-relieving' exercises of your own.

No lies necessary. Only humor and some excellent ear plugs. 

Have a lovely vacation!

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